08 December 2001

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Xfm Series 1
November 2001 - May 2002
List of episodes

Episodes:

  1. 10 November 2001 (Transcript)
  2. 17 November 2001 (Transcript)
  3. 24 November 2001 (Transcript)
  4. 01 December 2001 (Transcript)
  5. 08 December 2001 (Transcript)
  6. 15 December 2001 (Transcript)
  7. 22 December 2001 (Transcript)
  8. 12 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.1
  9. 19 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.2
  10. 26 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.3
  11. 09 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.4
  12. 16 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.5
  13. 23 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.6
  14. 02 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.7
  15. 09 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.8
  16. 16 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.9
  17. 23 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.10
  18. 30 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.11
  19. 06 April 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.12
  20. 13 April 2002 (Transcript)
  21. 20 April 2002 (Transcript)
  22. 27 April 2002 (Transcript)
  23. 04 May 2002 (Transcript)

MC Hammer used to keep a lot of bibles in his trousers to give them to poor people.

Karl laughs at being called the k man. Ricky calls Pilkington is a funny name. Ricky and Stephen are the first to mock the name. Karl has a go at Gervais' name.

Karl had a mobile disco with Glen Makin: "Pilkie's Makin Music". Steve's mobile disco was called the Rock'n'Roll DJs. Ricky had to play their records at a pub. Stephen rants on and on about how to DJ.

Karl has tickets K-fest. "A rock thing going on..." Karl laughs for no reason about Gervais questioning some of the two-bit bands playing. If you want to go answer the question, "Who wants to go to that?", you can be one of the lucky winners.

Rubbish presents revisited. Steve's father heard Steve slagging off his birthday present.

Weeing in the sink. Ricky once told a story about how he used to piss in the sink of the bedsit he had with his girlfriend "I used to lift the dishes - it was quite hygenic" and his girlfriend's mum was listening. Catlaw Ricky owns alot of things by weeing on them. Karl says that if you are stung by a jellyfish, wee stop its hurting. "Have you ever wet the bed?" Ricky stayed at his girlfriend's parent's house and got so drunk he collapsed on the floor and amused himself trying to trip people over... and pissed on her while she was in bed.

"Put it down, it's dirty!" Ricky once thought a used condom was a discarded snakeskin and tried to torment his sister with it.

Animals. Steve's mate tried to give a dead bird the kiss of life by kissing it then throwing it in the air. Ricky killed a fish with a bow and arrow. He threw the dead fish in the drains, and he ran loads of loads journeys with handfuls of bleach to cover up the fish murder and not go to jail.

Karl had a pet magpie called "Maggie": "...it flew around and it would come to me all the time, then it started pecking me head..." Karls mom, "Don't chase the butterfly, Karl", so Karl said he would find one in the morning.

Steve was working at the BBC, driving a hire car, ferrying actors around, a white van came into the garage while he was filling up and was offered "a couple of speakers".

Ricky's Film Review: Schindler's List: It is all black and white except for a red coat. It is about a bloke called Schindler and he wanted to save people, so he made a list. He tried to save as many as he could and not make bullets properly. They gave him a ring in the end. Same bloke who made ET. Ricky gives it 9 out of 10. Karl hasn't seen it and gives it a 9 out of 10 because of that red coat effect. It was just a mistake apprantly. Lord of the Rings: Brilliant film even though its about wizards called gonads with beard. Robbie Coltrane is in it. Swords and stuff and some magic. He is the actual Lord of the Rings. Ricky gives it 9 out of 10. Karl isn't convinced but still gives it a 9 out of 10.

That was a load of shit, sorry about that. Ricky hates Muse, but Karl accuses him of buying LFO. Karl panders to the listeners. What's the difference between Muse and Radiohead - phone in.

Steve saw The White Stripes this week - "best band I've seen since a little band I saw called Oasis for a fiver at Coventry Poly". Stephen lists more about the instruments used than the actual expeirence.

Keep to a playlist. "I don't want to ever play "Feeling Good" again, or Kosheen," or Basement Jaxx. Play 5 songs over and over again. Ricky is willing to take bribes, like "Carter have sent me some chocolates..." "Anything there from the Senseless Things or the Wonder Stuff?"

Make up. "Let's go and kiss and touch Karl"

Song for the Lovers: Neil Young - "Man Needs A Maid"

Song for the Ladies: Drugstore - "White Magic For Lovers"

That Playstation Game Sounds Good: Feeder - "Just A Day"

Hip-hop Hooray: Mad Skillz