15 February 2003/Transcript

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This is a transcript of the 15 February 2003 episode, from Xfm Series 2

They Need A War

Ricky: White Stripes, “Dead Leaves on the Dirty Ground” on XFM 104.9. I’m Ricky Gervais. With me, Steve Merchant, Karl Pilkington. We have got a great show lined up for you.

Steve: Absolutely.

Ricky: Today it’s just, uh, yeah. Valentine’s Day weekend. Some love songs.

Steve: Ooh.

Ricky: We got some chat and, of course, the competitions. I’ll tell ya what; I was walking here today and the West End is crammed. There’s helicopters, there’s police, there’s about a million people, sort of, just milling ‘round. Standing around with placards and stuff. I don’t know what they’re doing, but they got too much time on their hands. They-they need a war!

Steve: You don’t read the newspapers, do you?

Ricky: Boring.

Song: Guns N’ Roses- Sweet Child ‘o Mine


OK, Stop Eating Karl, You've Ate All The Food, That's The Plate

It's A Bit Of A Monkey Bonus

I'm Not Annoying Karl, So Why Are You?

XFamily Fortunes...Smelly Eyebrows

You've Given Him An Inch And He's Taken A Yard

Will You Come To The Book Shop

I Must Remember To Eat Next Time Suzanne Is Away

Steve Looks Annoyed

Shambles

You Did It On Purpose

I Need To Re-think This Whole Thing