08 December 2001

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Xfm Series 1
November 2001 - May 2002
List of episodes

Episodes:

  1. 10 November 2001 (Transcript)
  2. 17 November 2001 (Transcript)
  3. 24 November 2001 (Transcript)
  4. 01 December 2001 (Transcript)
  5. 08 December 2001 (Transcript)
  6. 15 December 2001 (Transcript)
  7. 22 December 2001 (Transcript)
  8. 12 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.1
  9. 19 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.2
  10. 26 January 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.3
  11. 09 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.4
  12. 16 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.5
  13. 23 February 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.6
  14. 02 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.7
  15. 09 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.8
  16. 16 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.9
  17. 23 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.10
  18. 30 March 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.11
  19. 06 April 2002 (Transcript) Early Years Ep.12
  20. 13 April 2002 (Transcript)
  21. 20 April 2002 (Transcript)
  22. 27 April 2002 (Transcript)
  23. 04 May 2002 (Transcript)

The 08 December 2001 show is all about embarrassing anecdotes and music of questionable quality.

Track Listing

For a full transcript of this episode see 08 December 2001/Transcript

1. Some Great Tunes (0:00:00)

Ricky and Steve have some great tunes lined up, but then realize they might not get to play them all if they talk too much.

2. Bibles in His Trousers (0:00:39)

Steve is saddened he never got to see the MC Hammer cartoons, and discloses that MC Hammer now tours the religious scene. This doesn't surprise Ricky, since MC Hammer apparently used to keep a lot of Bibles in his trousers so he could give them to poor people. According to Ricky, his Film Review has been getting attention from the likes of Scorsese. Steve coins the title Hip-Hop Hooray for the first time. Ricky and Steve offer up their advertising skills to new and upcoming "two-bit bands", but then start making fun of the name "Pilkington" and annoy Karl in the process. Steve also makes one of the 1st references to Claire Sturgess's 'smack problem' saying she wouldn't be in school because she'd be in rehab.

3. Pilkie's Makin Music (0:05:04)

Karl guesses the Lostprophets are American. Karl and Steve discover they both had a mobile disco in their younger days. Karl worked together with his mate Colin Makin under the name Pilkie's Makin Music and Steve operated under The Rock and Roll DJs. Steve then quizzes the other two on what to play at a wedding do, and gives his rendition of Oh What a Night by Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons.

4. K-Fest (0:09:22)

They've been given two tickets for K-Fest to give away, and Ricky and Steve start mocking the obscurity of the bands and artists performing, making Karl laugh. Steve is astounded that not even university-educated Ricky recognises the word "Behemoth". You can win the tickets if you call in and answer the question "Who wants to go?", which is an early version of the question Ricky poses for prizes during The Podfather Trilogy series: "Um ... do you wan' 'em?"

5. Pissing in the Sink (0:12:36)

Ricky and Steve wonder what's the big deal about Nu Metal music. Steve's father got upset after listening to the 24 November 2001 show, where Steve slagged off his birthday presents. Ricky retells the Pissing in the Sink story from Xfm Series 0. It turned out that Jane's mother had been listening to that show and asked her daughter about it afterwards. Jane denied everything, telling her Ricky made the lot up.

6. Pissing on Jane (0:16:19)

According to Ricky, there are societies (well, cats) where, when you wee on something you own it. Karl has useful information for people who've been stung by jellyfish. Ricky embarrasses himself some more by telling a story about when he was drunk once, and he mistook the bed for a toilet.

7. A Magpie Called Maggie (0:20:28)

When he was young, Ricky tried to frighten his sister with a snakeskin he had found on the beach, but is told years later by her it had been a used condom. Steve had a mate who gave the kiss of life to a dead bird. Ricky once killed a fish with a bow and arrow, then tried to erase all traces of his crime with Vim. Karl tells about his pet magpie back in the days when he was selling mackerel.

8. A Couple of Speakers (0:26:24)

Steve tells about the time he almost bought speakers from two guys who supposedly were delivery men for Dixons.
Song For The Lovers: Neil Young - A Man Needs A Maid

9. Ricky's Film Review (0:35:55)

Ricky reviews Schindler's List and gives it 9 out of 10. Karl hasn't seen it but gives it a 9 out of 10 because of "that red coat effect". Ricky offers Hollywood to give good reviews in exchange for money. As an example, he positively reviews Lord Of The Rings without even having seen it.

10. That Was a Load of Shit (0:39:32)

They ended up playing Muse, much to Ricky's dismay. Karl thinks it's not that bad, and states that Muse sounds similar to Radiohead. Steve reviews the White Stripes concert he went to, but ends up listing the instruments.
That Playstation Game Sounds Good: Feeder - Just A Day

11. Where’s Your Head At? (0:42:44)

Ricky never wants to play Feeling Good by Muse again. Or Kosheen. Steve wants a ban on Basement Jaxx. However, Ricky is willing to take bribes, like "Carter USM have sent me some chocolates...".

12. Kiss and Touch Karl (0:45:40)

Steve thanks Karl for his contributions, and thinks they should make up for the Muse incident, prompting Steve and Ricky to go over to Karl to kiss and touch him. As Song For The Ladies starts playing, Steve can be heard saying to Ricky "Take the jumper off".
Song For The Ladies: Drugstore - White Magic For Lovers

Quotes

Ricky: The cartoon went mad and started spending a lot of money.

Ricky: Mark Lanegan really playing there?
Karl: I think so.
Ricky: God! Who's that?

Steve: And they went, "Ayyy. D’ya’ wanna buy a coupla speakers?" And I said: Yes I do!

Steve: They were the best band I had seen live since I saw a little band, you might have heard of, called Oasis For Five Pounds at Coventry Poly
Ricky: Ya? That's a long name for a band.

Playlist

Ash - There's a Star
Eminem - The Real Slim Shady
Lostprophets - Shinobi vs. Dragon Ninja
Coldplay - Yellow
Sum41 - In Too Deep
De La Soul - Watch Out
Oasis - Don't Look Back In Anger
Hip-Hop Hooray: Mad Skillz - Ghostwriter
Gorillaz - Rok Da House
Wu Tang Clan - Gravel Pit
Song For The Lovers: Neil Young - A Man Needs A Maid
Eels - Fresh Feeling
Muse - Feeling Good
That Playstation Game Sounds Good: Feeder - Just A Day
Radiohead - Just
Song For The Ladies: Drugstore - White Magic For Lovers

Download

Download Page

External Links

White Van Speaker Scam on Wikipedia
List of the 2001 dates and artists of K-Fest
Mark Lanegan on Wikipedia

Series 0   |   Series 1   |   Series 2   |   Series 3   |   Series 4
Presenters Ricky Gervais | Stephen Merchant | Karl Pilkington
Others Claire Sturgess | Ian Camfield | Simon Pegg | Nick Frost
Features Monkey News | Rockbusters | Song For The Ladies | Song For The Lovers
Hip-Hop Hooray | Cheap as Chimps | White Van Karl | Songs of Phrase
Cheeky Freak of the Week | Do We Need 'Em? | More...