31 August 2002/Transcript

This is a transcription of the 31 August 2002 episode, from Xfm Series 2

In the Beginning

Ricky: Back to form there - Oasis and Little By Little. This is Xfm 104.9, I'm Ricky Gervais, who are you?

Steve: Er, my name's Steve Merchant, good to see you.

Ricky: Thanks. Er, with us, er, the producer in the studio is Karl Pilkington. And he'll be doing the m-buttons...

Steve: Yeah? You made a good effort there...

Ricky laughs

Steve: But er, once again...

Ricky: Got bored.

Steve: Words are your enemy Rick, and they defeated you once again.

Ricky laughs

Steve: Just ran out of steam with the sentences.

Ricky: Ohh, every week I think right, I'm really gonna make an effort now.

Steve: Yeah.

Ricky: I'm gonna, I've, I've chosen some records...

Steve: Yeah.

Ricky: That's it.

Steve: That's it. That's as far as it goes isn't it?

Ricky: Yeah.

Steve: Maybe you should write out what you're gonna say at the top of the show?

Ricky laughs

Steve: Write that out. Get a nice big crayon.

Ricky: No, I like to keep a little bit of...

Ricky clicks his fingers

Ricky: You know.

Steve: Little bit of sumin'. Little bit of spark. Little bit of liveliness to it, sure.

Ricky: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Steve: Sure, sure, sure, sure.

Ricky: Yeah.

Steve: How are you? Good, good to see you

Ricky: Yeah, great. It's great to be er...

Steve: It's great to be out

Ricky laughs

Steve: Out of the house again.

Ricky: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Just, erm, I was going to say because we've been doing this for a long time now with a little break, erm, but XFM are bringing new listeners all the time. I've heard four or five a week.

Steve: Really?

Ricky: Yeah.

Steve: Wow, man alive.

Ricky: New listeners tune in to XFM 104.9.

Steve: Radio 1 beware!

Ricky laughs

Ricky: Yeah, yeah. And, uh, we might take it for granted that people that know who we are, know who you are, know who Karl is.

Steve: Sure.

Ricky: Erm.

Steve: Old listeners, certainly.

Ricky: Now, if, if, if you, you know, if you're a regular then you know exactly who we are. But, erm, for those of you who don't, uh, I'll say I'm, I'm Ricky Gervais.

Steve: Ricky Gervais, BAFTA-award winning actor and, uh--

Ricky: Yeah, yeah.

Steve: And writer.

Ricky: Steve Merchant, erm, all those.

Steve: Friend of yours.

Ricky: Yeah, yeah. And, this is the important thing, Karl Pilkington.

Steve: Absolutely.

Ricky: Our, erm, produ-- I say producer. He was the bloke who was lumbered with the job. When I said, "Listen--" See I used to run the desk in the old days when I was working for XFM, I used to press the buttons and run the desk and everything. And then I said, "Listen, I've been on the telly, I do not press my own buttons." And Karl said, "Well, I don't really work weekends." And they went, "Well, you do if you want to keep your job."

Steve: Absolutely.

Ricky: And we were lumbered with him. And then we discovered that he's not just a, a little, like a little dork. A little Manc-y, sort of, idiot.

Steve: Sure. Sure.

Ricky: He's got, he's got a nice shirt. He's got, you know what I mean? He's got something else.

Steve: Absolutely. He brings another dimension, yeah.

Ricky: Yeah. And, uh, he, he started having a little chat and we discovered--

Steve: We both love him.

Ricky: That he had quite a lot to say.

Steve: Mm. Well I, I think you're absolutely right and I think, um- I was wondering maybe we should maybe play another tune. But after that, I just think we should refamiliarize our radio audience with Karl.

Ricky: Yeah.

Steve: And any new listeners, just get- let, somehow, kind of let them get to know the real Karl again.

Ricky: Well if you are new, you'll, you'll find that we like some old songs, some new songs, some chitter-chat. Uh, we get serious sometimes.

Steve: Oh yeah.

Ricky: There's some tears and some laughter.

Steve: Yeah.

Ricky: We kicked off with Oasis's new one, "Little by Little". We're going to go back in time now to Iggy Pop and his Stooges with "I'm Bored."

Song: Iggy Pop - I'm Bored