Martin Wells
Martin Wells was a schooldays contemporary of Stephen Merchant and is forever immortalised in Pilkipedia fandom.
When Steve was about 15, he fancied a girl who was in a school play with him. He tried to impress her by reading Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance in a room she might enter. After an hour and a half on his own, she came in looking for Martin Wells. Steve pointed her to the party room next door and kept reading for another 15 minutes, then went in there to find her getting off with him, "'cause he'd been dancin' around with no trousers on!"