Karl Pilkington (born 23 September 1972 in Manchester, England) is an English radio producer, author, television presenter, actor and general round-headed buffoon. Having previously been known for producing The Ricky Gervais Show on the radio station Xfm, Pilkington reached an international audience through his appearances with Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant on the similarly titled, record-breaking podcast series. He has since been the presenter of Sky 1 documentary An Idiot Abroad, and starred as caretaker Dougie in Derek.
"Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out."
-Podcast Series 1, Episode Three
"In the sea you've got to be constantly sort of alert. It's worse in the sea [than anywhere else in the animal kingdom]. In the sea you've got an enemy behind every rock."
-Podcast Series 3, Episode Two
"Neil Armstrong, that spaceman, he went to the moon but he ain't been back. It can't have been that good."
-3 Minute Wonder, Episode 2
I got involved once... with the police and that, when I lived in Manchester and saw a bit of car crime going on. And I got involved, it was hassle, tellin' you. 'Cause I thought "Well, I'd hope somebody did it with my car." And, I had to stand on a balcony in this tower block that I lived in, police shouting up at me and I'm stood there with me underpants on, right? So I call up the police and that, right? Said "Right, listen, errm, car's been robbed" and they said "Where is it?" I said "I dunno, just across the road from where I live." Right? So I tell them where I live. So she's, she's askin' loads of questions and that, I'm saying "Look, whilst you're asking all of this they're actually getting away so, you know we'll leave it." And she's like "No, err, we'll track it down blah blah blah." So I said "Well look I work nights." I could see some lads, just pushing a car. It was late at night and that... And you don’t wanna start the engine. Anyway I said, "Look, don't call back I’m going to bed. Alright? I got work in a bit." Next thing, right the phone's going- "Hello, it’s the police again." "I said I told you not to call me." They said "Right, the police are outside, can you go on your balcony?" So I’m ten stories up, right? So I’m stood on the balcony with like me underpants on. Alright? And the police are saying "Where's the car?" And I’m saying "I don't know they've gone down that road now." So I’m trying to point to ‘em. They're shouting up saying "Which road?" and all that. And I just thought, why did I get involved? I don't think they found it, it was hassle. Just don't get involved. ~ K.P. (as told on 15 November 2003)
