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[[26 April 2003]] episode is notable for the introduction of the characters Camp David, the right queer gay and Ho-Lee Fuk as well as Ricky leaving the studio in the middle of [[Monkey News]].
This episode is notable for the introduction of the characters [[Camp David|Camp David, the right queer gay]] and [[Ho-Lee Fuk]] as well as Ricky leaving the studio in the middle of [[Monkey News]].


==Track Listing==
==Track Listing==
====1. [[In The Wars]] ''(h:mm:ss)''====
{|width=65% style="border-spacing:8px;margin:0px -8px"
Steve is back after having been at his parents house in Bristol for the past week nursing a sore throat. Ricky injured his back on Tuesday boxing, but is here too.  Karl on the other hand has just returned from holidays with Suzanne's parents.
!{{sectionhead|#EEEEEE|#AAAAAA|left|''For a full transcript of this episode see [[26 April 2003/Transcript]].''}}
|- 
|
|}
====1. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#How Old're You?|How Old're You?]] ''(0:00:00)''====
Steve is back after having been at his parents house in Bristol for the past week nursing a sore throat. (Karl is baffled). Ricky injured his back on Tuesday boxing, but is here too.  Karl has just returned from holidays with [[Suzanne]]'s parents.  


====2. [[Recap of Ricky & Karl's Meeting During The Week]] ''(0:03:08)''====
====2. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Froggy Says Buy It|Froggy Says Buy It]] ''(0:03:57)''====
Karl recaps Ricky and his meeting during the week which involved head squeezing technique practice and a recording of a advert which Karl promises later in the show.
Steve thinks he's ill from stress of London life, including the split-up of S Club 7.  Karl's not very compassionate with ill people, like the time he made Suzanne go shopping with him when she had a fever.  Recap of when Karl was picked to pass out biscuits at an old people's home and another place where people were "iller".  Karl plays two adverts Ricky has done for [[Xfm#X-Ray|X-Ray magazine]] in the week, one with him acting drunk/with mouth full and the [[Fan Animations#Dr. Frog|second]] with him as [[Dr Frog]].


<br>Thin Lizzy - ''The Boys Are Back In Town (00:03:46)''
====3. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Who's That at the Door?|Who's That at the Door?]] ''(0:11:42)''====
Ricky introduces us to his new characters [[Camp David]], the right queer gay and [[Ho-Lee Fuk]], the funny little Chinaman.  The latter's name is cause for concern for Karl.  Karl's thinking of re-introducing [[Rockbusters]], and Steve is appalled.


====3. [[Past Experiences With The Sick]] ''(0:04:08)''====
====4. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Gayvid Gray, the Bent Pianist|Gayvid Gray, the Bent Pianist]] ''(0:16:20)''====
Conversation returns to Steve's illness for a breif moment, before it turns to Karl recounting the first time Suzzanne was sick while they were going out. Suzzanne had a cold and Karl begged her to come to the supermarket and help him shop, he told her to "hang about in the frozen chicken section"... it made her worse.  Karl [[07 December 2002#Educating Ricky (Parts 1 & 2)|retells]] the story where he was chosen to serve biscuits to old people because of his clean nails.
Ricky has decided to change one of his character's names.  


====4. [[Ricky's Adverts]] ''(0:08:42)''====
====5. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Always Stinking of Chip Fat|Always Stinking of Chip Fat]] ''(0:16:47)''====
Karl has found the adverts Ricky recorded for [[Xfm#X-Ray|X-Ray magazine]] during the week.  One features Ricky acting a drunk/ageing Ricky, and the other features Dr. Frog.
Karl calls Steve "The Professor" behind his back because of a photo of him in a magazine, but Steve has his own names for Karl.  Some [[Karl vs. Steve]] banter as Steve thinks Karl must've been a neglected child.  His perceptions of the working class homes of Karl and Ricky's youths.  Steve loves Benjys.  In Waitrose a homeless man with open sores shook his hand, to Steve's terror.  Karl doesn't want Steve to ruin the plot of Columbo, and the boys question Columbo and his wife's hygiene.  Gayvid Gray, Columbo, and Ho-Lee are at the door. Steve wants listeners to email in about the return of Rockbusters, but Ricky doesn't want to let the listeners decide.


<br>Badly Drawn Boy - ''All Possibilities (00:11:38)''
====6. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#So Here We Go Then|So Here We Go Then]] ''(0:24:16)''====
[[Richard Anderson]] enters as one of Ricky's characters.  Ricky's not sure Steve understands comedy on radio.  Steve reads off the prizes which include ''Coogan's Run'' and a ''Dr Who'' episode on VHS and and X-List CD.  A recap of old Rockbusters clues before Karl reads this week's clues.


====5. [[Say Hello To Camp David & Ho-Lee Fuk]] ''(0:11:42)''====
====7. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#There's No Thread To Them|There's No Thread To Them]] ''(0:28:38)''====
Ricky introduces us to his new characters Camp David, the right queer gay and Ho-Lee Fuk, the funny little Chinaman.  The latter's name is cause for concern for Karl.
There's a Posh Bloke at the door.  Karl's obsessed with how Ricky's friends are all different from each other.  Karl doesn't like [[Robin Ince|Robin]] and Steve is horrified to hear about some quite rude behaviour from Karl towards Robin at dinner.
Robin has small thumbs and Karl's done some research on thumbs.  "Rule of thumb" etymology.  "No Petting" signs at public pools.  Karl then airs his disdain for public displays of affection.  A fat fella with lipstick is at the door.


====6. [[Rockbusters Is Back?]] ''(0:15:15)''====
====8. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Tourettes Trent D'Arby|Tourettes Trent D'Arby]] ''(0:36:47)''====
Karl floats the notion of reintroducing Rockbusters
Rockbusters answers and Ricky tells Karl that he is never doing the quiz again. Karl bemoans the mountains of emails he received from listeners at the request of Ricky and Steve on [[19 April 2003|last week's show]].  A listener named Peter Kay came in first but they give it to another person so Peter Kay comes in second.


<br>Sugar - ''If I Can't Change Your Mind (00:16:16)''
====9. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#I'd Like a Severe Blow|I'd Like a Severe Blow]] ''(0:40:43)''====
<br>Coldplay - ''The Scientist (00:16:45)''
Karl gives away some Rockbusters workings. Gayvid Gray drops in once again briefly.


====7. [[The Professor]] ''(0:16:53)''====
====10. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Talkin' of Weird Heads and Stuff|Talkin' of Weird Heads and Stuff]] ''(0:41:48)''====
Karl has apparently labelled Steve "The Professor" after a photo of Steve in New Media magazine.  Conversation soon turns to the looks of childhood Karl and Ricky.
Steve's put on his duffle coat and looks like someone in Forbidden Planet. The bidding for Ricky's cartoon of Karl is now up to 200 quid.  Ricky wants the winner to be able to squeeze Karl's head, which Karl refuses point-blank.  They have to make time for Monkey News lest Karl takes it to Radio 2.  Karl tells Steve about his recent holiday with Suzanne's parents.  People annoy Karl and he recounts several examples of how they did.


====8. [[All Things Hygienic]] ''(0:18:57)''====
====11. [[26 April 2003/Transcript#Restaurants Don't Allow Animals|Restaurants Don't Allow Animals]] ''(0:52:15)''====
Steve recounts a story from earlier in the week where a homeless man shook his hand in line for a sandwhich.  The boys then question the hygeine of Columbo.  Camp David returns from earlier as Gayvid Gray, the bent pianist.
Cutting U2 short because they are running late.  [[Cheeky Freak of the Week]] is people with deformed back legs known as "dogpeople".  Ricky questions whether this segment is offensive in any way.  Time for [[Monkey News]]: a follow-up to a [[12 April 2003|previous segment]] about Alfred who robbed the robber at the bank.  After taking the money and weapons, he negotiates a deal with the zookeepers to ensure their release in exchange for funds.  Ricky is so infuriated that he leaves the studio midway through the story.


====9. [[Rockbusters|Rockbusters Is Back!]] ''(0:23:55)''====
==Rockbusters==
<br>The Who - ''The Seeker (00:24:15)''
The gingerbread man has only got one leg.  <span title="Limp Bizkit" style="color: red" id=title>L.B.</span><br>
<br>After a 5 minute e-mail poll, Rockbusters returns.  In the interim [[Richard Anderson]] enters as one of Ricky's characters.  Up for grabs today, a Yardbirds CD, a <i>Kugan's Run</i> VHS, <i>Dr Who</i> VHS and X-List CD, aka The Usual Tat.<br>
These people from the East Midlands swear a lot. <span title="Terrence Trent D'Arby" style="color: red" id=title>T.T.D.</span><br>
The clues are: <br>
Have a holiday in Italy. <span title="Turin Brakes" style="color: red" id=title>T.B.</span><br>
 
<b>LB:</b> The Gingerbread Man has only got one leg. <br>
<b>TTD:</b> These people from the East Midlands swear a lot. <br>
<b>TB:</b> Have a holiday in Italy. <br>
 
<br>Feeder - ''Think About Tomorrow (00:28:37)''
<br>Placebo - ''The Bitter End (00:28:38)''
 
====10. [[The Characters In Ricky's Life]] ''(0:28:55)''====
Posh Bloke Who Doesn't Care About The Homeless, joins Ricky's cast of characters, starting a discussion on how Karl finds Ricky's friends are all different.  Ricky recounts a story where he, after knowing Karl found his friend Robin annoying, set up a meeting between the two resulting in some reasonably anti-social behaviour having Karl ask "What is he doing here?  You know I hate him".
 
====11. [[A Rule Of Thumb]] ''(0:33:30)''====
Robin's small thumbs cause Karl to research little thumbs.  He found that the saying "A Rule Of Thumb" comes from husbands not being able to hit their wives with anything thinner than their thumb.
 
====12. [[Kissing]] ''(0:35:17)''====
Steve and Ricky mock the "No Petting" signs at public pools.  Karl then airs his disdain for public displays of affection.  A Fat Fella With Lipstick joins as a character into the song.
 
<br>The Cure - ''The Forest (00:36:45)''
 
====11. [[Rockbusters|Rockbusters Results]] ''(0:37:00)''====
Robin's small thumbs cause Karl to research little thumbs. He found that the saying "A Rule Of Thumb" comes from husbands not being able to hit their wives with anything thinner than their thumb.
 
<b>Limp Bizkit:</b>The Gingerbread Man has only got one leg. <br>
<b>Terence Trent D'Arby (Tourette's-Trent-Derby):</b> These people from the East Midlands swear a lot. <br>
<b>Turin Brakes:</b> Have a holiday in Italy. <br>
 
====12. [[The Aftermarth]] ''(0:38:50)''====
Karl bemoans the mountains of emails he recieved from listeners at the request of Ricky and Steve on [[19 April 2003|last week's show]].
 
<br>Radiohead - ''There There (00:40:40)''
 
Gayvid Gray drops in once again briefly.
 
<br>Steeley Dan - ''Realing In The Gears (00:41:53)''
 
====13. [[Karltoon]] ''(0:42:12)''====
The bidding for Ricky's cartoon of Karl bidding is now up to 200 quid.  Karl coins the now infamous "squoozed" term.
 
====14. [[Karl's Holiday]] ''(0:45:00)''====
Karl recounts to Steve his recent holiday with Suzanne's parents. Things got off to a rocky start after Karl made a joke about her mother dying and while Karl liked the villa, he did find it difficult to get alone time with Suzanne.
 
<br>U2 - ''With Or Without You (00:51:49)''
 
====15. [[Cheeky Freak of the Week]] ''(0:52:15)''====
Today is people with deformed back legs known as "dogpeople".  Ricky questions wether this segment is offensive in anyway.
 
====16. [[Monkey News]] ''(0:54:23)''====
Today is a follow up to a [[12 April 2003|previous]] Monkey News about Alfred who robbed the robber at the bank.  Alfred, after taking the money and taking weapons manages to negotiate and strike a deal with the zookeepers to ensure their release in exchange for funds.  Ricky is so infuriated by the story that he leaves the studio midway through the story.
 
<br>REM - ''What's The Frequency Kenneth? (00:59:19)''


==Quotes==
==Quotes==
'''Karl:''' Does the Office sound good, as a title? ''(0:25:30)''
'''Karl''': I'm into biscuits. <br>
 
<br>
 
'''Steve''': We'd all agreed that Rockbusters was a piece of old toss! <br>
'''Karl:''' His name is Robin, he has really small thumbs ''(0:33:20)''
<br>
 
'''Steve''': It's email only.  We don't want to speak to these freaks.  <br>
==Trivia==
<br>
 
'''Karl''': Does the Office sound good, as a title?<br>
<br>
'''Ricky''': Don't. Talk. Shite. Twice. <br>
<br>
'''Ricky''': [Karl's] got the best mind working on radio today.  It's incredible.<br>
'''Steve''': The only person who makes less sense is Terry Wogan. <br>


==Playlist==
==Playlist==
Blur - ''Out of Time'' <br>
Thin Lizzy - ''The Boys Are Back In Town''<br>
Badly Drawn Boy - ''All Possibilities'' <br>
Sugar - ''If I Can't Change Your Mind''<br>
Coldplay - ''The Scientist''<br>
The Who - ''The Seeker''  <br>
Feeder - ''Forget About Tomorrow''<br>
Placebo - ''The Bitter End''<br>
The Cure - ''A Forest''<br>
Radiohead - ''There There''<br>
Steely Dan - ''Reelin' In The Years''<br>
[[U2]] - ''With Or Without You''<br>
REM - ''What's The Frequency Kenneth?''


==External Links==
* [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benjys Wikipedia article on Benjys]
* [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forbidden_Planet_%28bookstore%29 Wikipedia article on Forbidden Planet]


==Extras==
{{Xfm Box}}
 
 
==Download==


 
[[Category:Episode Pages|2.36]]
{{Xfm Box}}

Latest revision as of 22:49, 30 April 2021

Xfm Series 2
August 2002 - August 2003
List of episodes

Episodes:

  1. 24 August 2002 (Transcript)
  2. 31 August 2002 (Transcript)
  3. 07 September 2002 (Transcript)
  4. 14 September 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  5. 21 September 2002 (Transcript)
  6. 28 September 2002 (Transcript)
  7. 05 October 2002 (Transcript)
  8. 12 October 2002 (Transcript)
  9. 19 October 2002 (Transcript)
  10. 26 October 2002 (Transcript)
  11. 02 November 2002 (Transcript)
  12. 09 November 2002 (Transcript)
  13. 16 November 2002 (Transcript)
  14. 23 November 2002 (Transcript)
  15. 30 November 2002 (Transcript)
  16. 07 December 2002 (Transcript)
  17. 14 December 2002 (Transcript)
  18. 21 December 2002 (Transcript)
  19. 28 December 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  20. 04 January 2003 (Transcript)
  21. 11 January 2003 (Transcript)
  22. 18 January 2003 (Transcript)
  23. 25 January 2003 (Transcript)
  24. 01 February 2003 (Transcript)
  25. 08 February 2003 (Transcript)
  26. 15 February 2003 (Transcript)
  27. 22 February 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  28. 01 March 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  29. 08 March 2003 (Transcript)
  30. 15 March 2003 (Transcript)
  31. 22 March 2003 (Transcript)
  32. 29 March 2003 (Transcript)
  33. 05 April 2003 (Transcript)
  34. 12 April 2003 (Transcript)
  35. 19 April 2003 (Transcript)
  36. 26 April 2003 (Transcript)
  37. 03 May 2003 (Transcript)
  38. 10 May 2003 (Transcript)
  39. 17 May 2003 (Transcript)
  40. 31 May 2003 (Transcript)
  41. 07 June 2003 (Transcript)
  42. 14 June 2003 (Transcript)
  43. 21 June 2003 (Transcript)
  44. 28 June 2003
  45. 05 July 2003
  46. 12 July 2003
  47. 19 July 2003
  48. 26 July 2003
  49. 02 August 2003
  50. 09 August 2003
  51. 16 August 2003

This episode is notable for the introduction of the characters Camp David, the right queer gay and Ho-Lee Fuk as well as Ricky leaving the studio in the middle of Monkey News.

Track Listing

For a full transcript of this episode see 26 April 2003/Transcript.

1. How Old're You? (0:00:00)

Steve is back after having been at his parents house in Bristol for the past week nursing a sore throat. (Karl is baffled). Ricky injured his back on Tuesday boxing, but is here too. Karl has just returned from holidays with Suzanne's parents.

2. Froggy Says Buy It (0:03:57)

Steve thinks he's ill from stress of London life, including the split-up of S Club 7. Karl's not very compassionate with ill people, like the time he made Suzanne go shopping with him when she had a fever. Recap of when Karl was picked to pass out biscuits at an old people's home and another place where people were "iller". Karl plays two adverts Ricky has done for X-Ray magazine in the week, one with him acting drunk/with mouth full and the second with him as Dr Frog.

3. Who's That at the Door? (0:11:42)

Ricky introduces us to his new characters Camp David, the right queer gay and Ho-Lee Fuk, the funny little Chinaman. The latter's name is cause for concern for Karl. Karl's thinking of re-introducing Rockbusters, and Steve is appalled.

4. Gayvid Gray, the Bent Pianist (0:16:20)

Ricky has decided to change one of his character's names.

5. Always Stinking of Chip Fat (0:16:47)

Karl calls Steve "The Professor" behind his back because of a photo of him in a magazine, but Steve has his own names for Karl. Some Karl vs. Steve banter as Steve thinks Karl must've been a neglected child. His perceptions of the working class homes of Karl and Ricky's youths. Steve loves Benjys. In Waitrose a homeless man with open sores shook his hand, to Steve's terror. Karl doesn't want Steve to ruin the plot of Columbo, and the boys question Columbo and his wife's hygiene. Gayvid Gray, Columbo, and Ho-Lee are at the door. Steve wants listeners to email in about the return of Rockbusters, but Ricky doesn't want to let the listeners decide.

6. So Here We Go Then (0:24:16)

Richard Anderson enters as one of Ricky's characters. Ricky's not sure Steve understands comedy on radio. Steve reads off the prizes which include Coogan's Run and a Dr Who episode on VHS and and X-List CD. A recap of old Rockbusters clues before Karl reads this week's clues.

7. There's No Thread To Them (0:28:38)

There's a Posh Bloke at the door. Karl's obsessed with how Ricky's friends are all different from each other. Karl doesn't like Robin and Steve is horrified to hear about some quite rude behaviour from Karl towards Robin at dinner. Robin has small thumbs and Karl's done some research on thumbs. "Rule of thumb" etymology. "No Petting" signs at public pools. Karl then airs his disdain for public displays of affection. A fat fella with lipstick is at the door.

8. Tourettes Trent D'Arby (0:36:47)

Rockbusters answers and Ricky tells Karl that he is never doing the quiz again. Karl bemoans the mountains of emails he received from listeners at the request of Ricky and Steve on last week's show. A listener named Peter Kay came in first but they give it to another person so Peter Kay comes in second.

9. I'd Like a Severe Blow (0:40:43)

Karl gives away some Rockbusters workings. Gayvid Gray drops in once again briefly.

10. Talkin' of Weird Heads and Stuff (0:41:48)

Steve's put on his duffle coat and looks like someone in Forbidden Planet. The bidding for Ricky's cartoon of Karl is now up to 200 quid. Ricky wants the winner to be able to squeeze Karl's head, which Karl refuses point-blank. They have to make time for Monkey News lest Karl takes it to Radio 2. Karl tells Steve about his recent holiday with Suzanne's parents. People annoy Karl and he recounts several examples of how they did.

11. Restaurants Don't Allow Animals (0:52:15)

Cutting U2 short because they are running late. Cheeky Freak of the Week is people with deformed back legs known as "dogpeople". Ricky questions whether this segment is offensive in any way. Time for Monkey News: a follow-up to a previous segment about Alfred who robbed the robber at the bank. After taking the money and weapons, he negotiates a deal with the zookeepers to ensure their release in exchange for funds. Ricky is so infuriated that he leaves the studio midway through the story.

Rockbusters

The gingerbread man has only got one leg. L.B.
These people from the East Midlands swear a lot. T.T.D.
Have a holiday in Italy. T.B.

Quotes

Karl: I'm into biscuits.

Steve: We'd all agreed that Rockbusters was a piece of old toss!

Steve: It's email only. We don't want to speak to these freaks.

Karl: Does the Office sound good, as a title?

Ricky: Don't. Talk. Shite. Twice.

Ricky: [Karl's] got the best mind working on radio today. It's incredible.
Steve: The only person who makes less sense is Terry Wogan.

Playlist

Blur - Out of Time
Thin Lizzy - The Boys Are Back In Town
Badly Drawn Boy - All Possibilities
Sugar - If I Can't Change Your Mind
Coldplay - The Scientist
The Who - The Seeker
Feeder - Forget About Tomorrow
Placebo - The Bitter End
The Cure - A Forest
Radiohead - There There
Steely Dan - Reelin' In The Years
U2 - With Or Without You
REM - What's The Frequency Kenneth?

External Links

Series 0   |   Series 1   |   Series 2   |   Series 3   |   Series 4
Presenters Ricky Gervais | Stephen Merchant | Karl Pilkington
Others Claire Sturgess | Ian Camfield | Simon Pegg | Nick Frost
Features Monkey News | Rockbusters | Song For The Ladies | Song For The Lovers
Hip-Hop Hooray | Cheap as Chimps | White Van Karl | Songs of Phrase
Cheeky Freak of the Week | Do We Need 'Em? | More...
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