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'''''This episode is a 'Best of' compilation'''''
[[Ricky]] is on holiday in Italy, [[Steve]] can't be bothered to come in, so [[Karl]] is left holding the fort, playing the 'best' bits.
----
With Ricky on holiday in Italy (see [[07 September 2002]]), Karl is left introducing this 'Best of' compilation.


==Track Listing==
==Track Listing==
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1. '''Underpants, Monkey Butlers and Tigers'''
====1. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Y-Front Discussion|Y-Front Discussion]] ''(0:00:00)''====
<br>Karl introduces the 'Best of' show. The first clip has Ricky and Steve contemplating Karl's query of whether men actually use the flap in the underwear. Steve reads some trivia about babboon waiters in Egypt. Karl gives an animal fact about shaving a tiger. And Ricky gives his animal fact about the colour of a polar bear's skin.
Karl introduces the 'Best of' show. The first clip has Ricky and Steve contemplating Karl's query of whether men actually use the flap in the underwear. Steve reads some trivia about the ancient Egyptians training baboons to wait on tables. Karl gives an animal fact about shaving a tiger (it's still stripy without the fur). And Ricky gives his animal fact about the colour of a polar bear's skin.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[26_January_2002/Transcript#Have_You_Ever_Used_A_Y-front_Properly.3F|26 January 2002]]'''''
 
 
2. '''Tales of the Unexpected'''
<br>Karl objects to Ricky's story about a man who had his head cut off and spoke to his mate after decapitation. He says it would work if it were chickens. Karl tells a story about a woman who was buried alive on top of the man who was supposed to break her out.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
 
 
3. '''Horse In The House'''
<br>Karl introduces another link, saying it's not the best bits, it's the first bit he found when editing. This clip has Karl telling the story of a family from the Manchester estate he grew up on who kept a horse in their house.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''


====2. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Tall Tales Of The Unexpected|Tall Tales Of The Unexpected]] ''(0:06:40)''====
Karl objects to Ricky's story about a man who had his head cut off and spoke to his mate after decapitation. He says it would work if it were chickens. Karl tells a story about a woman who was buried alive on top of the man who was supposed to break her out.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[06 April 2002|06 April 2002]]'''''


4. '''Flower Power'''
====3. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Apparently, Some Lad Had A Horse In His House Or Something|Apparently, Some Lad Had A Horse In His House Or Something]] ''(0:13:06)''====
<br>When a charity visits Karl's school and presents some fundraising ideas, Karl decides to raise money for himself by taking some "snippins" off his mother's flowers and selling them. Karl then talks more about the family with a horse in the house, who also had a beautiful child who grew up to have patchy hair and chase cars.
Karl introduces another link, saying it's not the best bits - it's the first bit he found when editing. This clip has Karl telling the story of a family from the Manchester estate he grew up on who kept a horse in their house.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[06_April_2002/Transcript#The_Horse_in_the_House_-_part_1|06 April 2002]]'''''


====4. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Rough Woman Looks Like Pauline Quirke|Rough Woman Looks Like Pauline Quirke]] ''(0:17:47)''====
When a charity visits Karl's school and presents some fundraising ideas, Karl decides to raise money for himself by taking some "snippins" off his mother's flowers and selling them. Karl then talks more about the family with a horse in the house, who also had a beautiful child who grew up to have patchy hair and chase cars.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[06_April_2002/Transcript#The_Horse_in_the_House_-_part_2|06 April 2002]]'''''


5. '''The Re-education of Karl'''
====5. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Karl's Prepared Some Quotes|Karl's Prepared Some Quotes]] ''(0:23:20)''====
<br>Karl presents the homework that Ricky set him, which was to study some famous quotes.  
Karl presents the homework that Ricky set him, which was to study some famous quotes.  
Karl then challenges Ricky and Steve to guess which of the three quotes he read out is the one he's made up.
Karl then challenges Ricky and Steve to guess which of the three quotes he read out is the one he's made up.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[13_April_2002/Transcript#The_Way_I_See_It|13 April 2002]]'''''
 
 
6. '''Cat Food'''
<br>Ricky and Steve get to the true meaning of Karl's cat food quote.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''


====6. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Catfood Stinks Don't It|Catfood Stinks Don't It]] ''(0:26:19)''====
Ricky and Steve get to the true meaning of Karl's cat food quote.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[13_April_2002/Transcript#Forrest_Gump_Was_a_Bit_of_a_Nutter|13 April 2002]]'''''


7. '''Record Swap'''
====7. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Ricky And Karl Do A Bit Of Light Thieving|Ricky And Karl Do A Bit Of Light Thieving]] ''(0:30:09)''====
<br>When Ricky was a child he swapped his brother's Elvis records for some chemicals, but he felt guilty and confessed to his mum. She said she wouldn't tell his brother if he was a good boy. But years later Ricky found out that his brother had actually given him the records in the first place.  
When Ricky was a child he swapped his brother's Elvis records for some chemicals, but he felt guilty and confessed to his mum. She said she wouldn't tell his brother if he was a good boy. But years later Ricky found out that his brother had actually given him the records in the first place.  
Karl matches Ricky's story with one where he unnecessarily confessed to nicking stuff.
Karl matches Ricky's story with one where he unnecessarily confessed to nicking stuff.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[20_April_2002/Transcript#How_Many_Calculators_Do_You_Need.3F|20 April 2002]]'''''
 
 
8. '''Poor Robin'''
<br>Karl tells Steve about meeting Ricky's long-suffering friend [[Robin Ince]] earlier in the week. Robin got annoyed when Karl kept asking him about embarrasing stories that Ricky had made up, such as having to sit on [[Spam]] to get rid of worms. But even when Ricky tells Karl he made the stories up, Karl insists that "there's no smoke without fire".
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
 
 
9. '''Vindicated'''
<br>A quick link in which Ricky says a caller has backed up Karl's claim that people have put bacon on their head to get worms out.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
 
 
10. '''Popsicle Hell'''
<br>Karl tells the traumatic story of choking on a Mr. Freeze ice pole, which gave Karl a near-death experience that changed his life <s>forever</s> for three days. Karl also tells another story where he tried to do his paper round but ended up dangling thirty foot up in the air from a bathroom window.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
 
 
11. '''Lateral Thinking'''
<br>Karl gives another introduction. In this clip Karl gets to grips with lateral thinking puzzles.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''


====8. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Robin Ince - Lucky Boy|Robin Ince - Lucky Boy]] ''(0:34:19)''====
Karl tells Steve about meeting Ricky's long-suffering friend [[Robin Ince]] earlier in the week. Robin got annoyed when Karl kept asking him about embarrassing stories that Ricky had made up, such as having to sit on [[Spam]] to get rid of worms. But even when Ricky tells Karl he made the stories up, Karl insists that "there's no smoke without fire".
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[13_April_2002/Transcript#Everyone_Likes_the_Smell_of_Bacon|13 April 2002]]'''''


12. '''Karl's Brother'''
====9. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Bacon Does Work|Bacon Does Work]] ''(0:40:00)''====
<br>Steve is baffled by a story about soldiers who are complaining that war isn't very nice. Karl says his soldier brother avoided the Falklands War by getting a note from his mum. Karl's brother was eventually kicked out of the army for running off with the sergeant's wife and nipping to the shops for some fags in a tank.
A quick link in which Ricky says a caller has backed up Karl's claim that people have put bacon on their head to get worms out.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: DAY MONTH YEAR'''''
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[13 April 2002|13 April 2002]]'''''


==Quotes==
====10. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Karl Versus Mr Freeze Pop|Karl Versus Mr Freeze Pop]] ''(0:40:39)''====
'''Karl:''' "Cat food, it stinks a bit, but if you don't put up with the smell the little kitten will die."
Karl tells the traumatic story of choking on a Mr. Freeze ice pole, which gave Karl a near-death experience that changed his life <s>forever</s> for three days. Karl also tells another story where he tried to do his paper round but ended up dangling thirty foot up in the air from a bathroom window. Also you may notice sirens in the background during this discussion.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[13_April_2002/Transcript#Mr_Freeze|13 April 2002]]'''''


====11. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Karl Lateral Damage|Karl Lateral Damage]] ''(0:49:53)''====
Karl gives another introduction. In this clip Karl gets to grips with lateral thinking puzzles.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[20_April_2002/Transcript#Bricks_Don.27t_Fall_In_Wars|20 April 2002]]'''''


'''Karl:''' "Bricks don't fall in wars"
====12. [[14 September 2002/Transcript#Don't Be Joining The Army, When There's A War On|Don't Be Joining The Army, When There's A War On]] ''(0:53:18)''====
Steve is baffled by a story about soldiers who are complaining that war isn't very nice. Karl says his [[Karl's Brother|soldier brother]] avoided the Falklands War by getting a note from his mum. Karl's brother was eventually kicked out of the army for running off with the sergeant's wife and nipping to the shops for some fags in a tank.
<br>'''''Originally Broadcast: [[09_March_2002/Transcript#Will_It_Be_Horrible|09 March 2002]]'''''


==Download==
{{Xfm Box}}
[http://www.sendspace.com/file/btyn3i 14 September 2002]


==See Also==
[[Category:Episode Pages|2.04]]
*[[Xfm Series 0]]
[[Category:Best-of Shows|1.00]]
*[[Xfm Series 1]]
*[[Xfm Series 3]]
*[[Xfm Series 4]]

Latest revision as of 00:35, 2 August 2020

Xfm Series 2
August 2002 - August 2003
List of episodes

Episodes:

  1. 24 August 2002 (Transcript)
  2. 31 August 2002 (Transcript)
  3. 07 September 2002 (Transcript)
  4. 14 September 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  5. 21 September 2002 (Transcript)
  6. 28 September 2002 (Transcript)
  7. 05 October 2002 (Transcript)
  8. 12 October 2002 (Transcript)
  9. 19 October 2002 (Transcript)
  10. 26 October 2002 (Transcript)
  11. 02 November 2002 (Transcript)
  12. 09 November 2002 (Transcript)
  13. 16 November 2002 (Transcript)
  14. 23 November 2002 (Transcript)
  15. 30 November 2002 (Transcript)
  16. 07 December 2002 (Transcript)
  17. 14 December 2002 (Transcript)
  18. 21 December 2002 (Transcript)
  19. 28 December 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  20. 04 January 2003 (Transcript)
  21. 11 January 2003 (Transcript)
  22. 18 January 2003 (Transcript)
  23. 25 January 2003 (Transcript)
  24. 01 February 2003 (Transcript)
  25. 08 February 2003 (Transcript)
  26. 15 February 2003 (Transcript)
  27. 22 February 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  28. 01 March 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of')
  29. 08 March 2003 (Transcript)
  30. 15 March 2003 (Transcript)
  31. 22 March 2003 (Transcript)
  32. 29 March 2003 (Transcript)
  33. 05 April 2003 (Transcript)
  34. 12 April 2003 (Transcript)
  35. 19 April 2003 (Transcript)
  36. 26 April 2003 (Transcript)
  37. 03 May 2003 (Transcript)
  38. 10 May 2003 (Transcript)
  39. 17 May 2003 (Transcript)
  40. 31 May 2003 (Transcript)
  41. 07 June 2003 (Transcript)
  42. 14 June 2003 (Transcript)
  43. 21 June 2003 (Transcript)
  44. 28 June 2003
  45. 05 July 2003
  46. 12 July 2003
  47. 19 July 2003
  48. 26 July 2003
  49. 02 August 2003
  50. 09 August 2003
  51. 16 August 2003

Ricky is on holiday in Italy, Steve can't be bothered to come in, so Karl is left holding the fort, playing the 'best' bits.

Track Listing

For a full transcript of this episode see 14 September 2002/Transcript.

1. Y-Front Discussion (0:00:00)

Karl introduces the 'Best of' show. The first clip has Ricky and Steve contemplating Karl's query of whether men actually use the flap in the underwear. Steve reads some trivia about the ancient Egyptians training baboons to wait on tables. Karl gives an animal fact about shaving a tiger (it's still stripy without the fur). And Ricky gives his animal fact about the colour of a polar bear's skin.
Originally Broadcast: 26 January 2002

2. Tall Tales Of The Unexpected (0:06:40)

Karl objects to Ricky's story about a man who had his head cut off and spoke to his mate after decapitation. He says it would work if it were chickens. Karl tells a story about a woman who was buried alive on top of the man who was supposed to break her out.
Originally Broadcast: 06 April 2002

3. Apparently, Some Lad Had A Horse In His House Or Something (0:13:06)

Karl introduces another link, saying it's not the best bits - it's the first bit he found when editing. This clip has Karl telling the story of a family from the Manchester estate he grew up on who kept a horse in their house.
Originally Broadcast: 06 April 2002

4. Rough Woman Looks Like Pauline Quirke (0:17:47)

When a charity visits Karl's school and presents some fundraising ideas, Karl decides to raise money for himself by taking some "snippins" off his mother's flowers and selling them. Karl then talks more about the family with a horse in the house, who also had a beautiful child who grew up to have patchy hair and chase cars.
Originally Broadcast: 06 April 2002

5. Karl's Prepared Some Quotes (0:23:20)

Karl presents the homework that Ricky set him, which was to study some famous quotes. Karl then challenges Ricky and Steve to guess which of the three quotes he read out is the one he's made up.
Originally Broadcast: 13 April 2002

6. Catfood Stinks Don't It (0:26:19)

Ricky and Steve get to the true meaning of Karl's cat food quote.
Originally Broadcast: 13 April 2002

7. Ricky And Karl Do A Bit Of Light Thieving (0:30:09)

When Ricky was a child he swapped his brother's Elvis records for some chemicals, but he felt guilty and confessed to his mum. She said she wouldn't tell his brother if he was a good boy. But years later Ricky found out that his brother had actually given him the records in the first place. Karl matches Ricky's story with one where he unnecessarily confessed to nicking stuff.
Originally Broadcast: 20 April 2002

8. Robin Ince - Lucky Boy (0:34:19)

Karl tells Steve about meeting Ricky's long-suffering friend Robin Ince earlier in the week. Robin got annoyed when Karl kept asking him about embarrassing stories that Ricky had made up, such as having to sit on Spam to get rid of worms. But even when Ricky tells Karl he made the stories up, Karl insists that "there's no smoke without fire".
Originally Broadcast: 13 April 2002

9. Bacon Does Work (0:40:00)

A quick link in which Ricky says a caller has backed up Karl's claim that people have put bacon on their head to get worms out.
Originally Broadcast: 13 April 2002

10. Karl Versus Mr Freeze Pop (0:40:39)

Karl tells the traumatic story of choking on a Mr. Freeze ice pole, which gave Karl a near-death experience that changed his life forever for three days. Karl also tells another story where he tried to do his paper round but ended up dangling thirty foot up in the air from a bathroom window. Also you may notice sirens in the background during this discussion.
Originally Broadcast: 13 April 2002

11. Karl Lateral Damage (0:49:53)

Karl gives another introduction. In this clip Karl gets to grips with lateral thinking puzzles.
Originally Broadcast: 20 April 2002

12. Don't Be Joining The Army, When There's A War On (0:53:18)

Steve is baffled by a story about soldiers who are complaining that war isn't very nice. Karl says his soldier brother avoided the Falklands War by getting a note from his mum. Karl's brother was eventually kicked out of the army for running off with the sergeant's wife and nipping to the shops for some fags in a tank.
Originally Broadcast: 09 March 2002

Series 0   |   Series 1   |   Series 2   |   Series 3   |   Series 4
Presenters Ricky Gervais | Stephen Merchant | Karl Pilkington
Others Claire Sturgess | Ian Camfield | Simon Pegg | Nick Frost
Features Monkey News | Rockbusters | Song For The Ladies | Song For The Lovers
Hip-Hop Hooray | Cheap as Chimps | White Van Karl | Songs of Phrase
Cheeky Freak of the Week | Do We Need 'Em? | More...
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