12 July 2003

Xfm Series 2 August 2002 - August 2003 List of episodes

Episodes: 24 August 2002 (Transcript) 31 August 2002 (Transcript) 07 September 2002 (Transcript) 14 September 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of') 21 September 2002 (Transcript) 28 September 2002 (Transcript) 05 October 2002 (Transcript) 12 October 2002 (Transcript) 19 October 2002 (Transcript) 26 October 2002 (Transcript) 02 November 2002 (Transcript) 09 November 2002 (Transcript) 16 November 2002 (Transcript) 23 November 2002 (Transcript) 30 November 2002 (Transcript) 07 December 2002 (Transcript) 14 December 2002 (Transcript) 21 December 2002 (Transcript) 28 December 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of') 04 January 2003 (Transcript) 11 January 2003 (Transcript) 18 January 2003 (Transcript) 25 January 2003 (Transcript) 01 February 2003 (Transcript) 08 February 2003 (Transcript) 15 February 2003 (Transcript) 22 February 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of') 01 March 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of') 08 March 2003 (Transcript) 15 March 2003 (Transcript) 22 March 2003 (Transcript) 29 March 2003 (Transcript) 05 April 2003 (Transcript) 12 April 2003 (Transcript) 19 April 2003 (Transcript) 26 April 2003 (Transcript) 03 May 2003 (Transcript) 10 May 2003 (Transcript) 17 May 2003 (Transcript) 31 May 2003 (Transcript) 07 June 2003 (Transcript) 14 June 2003 (Transcript) 21 June 2003 (Transcript) 28 June 2003 05 July 2003 12 July 2003 19 July 2003 26 July 2003 02 August 2003 09 August 2003 16 August 2003

Track Listing

1. I'd Turn Off today, Because there's Nothing (0:00:00)

A very tense start to the show. Ricky and Steve recorded a sketch about the radio authority, but Andrew Phillips banned Karl from playing it due to the swearing. Is Karl being a coward? Listener Dan reckons he could fill in for Karl as producer, which is handy as Karl insists he won't be doing the show anymore. Ricky gets worried as Karl ventures into the realms of blasphemy.

2. Behind The Bike Sheds Having A Swear (0:09:30)

Karl's mate got caught by swearing at school by a teacher, and had to write an essay full of swearwords as punishment. Unfortunately his mam found the essay and thought he was depressed. Did the same teacher hit Karl on the head with a block of wood? This leads to a discussion about winding up teachers, it appears Ricky's sense of humour hasn't matured much, as he and Steve hum to annoy Karl.

3. My Little Conspiracy (0:19:10)

Karl reckons his teachers made the pupils at school draw the content of their homes to find out who'd been nicking stuff. Auntie Nora's genitals get yet another mention. Shall we play Songs of Phrase?, the phrase is 'No More Cheeky Freak of the Week,' which has been axed because it's offensive. Karl quotes a line from the News about Siamese twins, which Ricky finds offensive.

4. No More Cheeky Freak Of The Week (0:23:03)

Ricky proclaims his love for The Darkness, as we go into Songs Of Phrase. Steve thinks it's tricky, and so changes the rules so only the artists are required. Prizes include a Jools Holland DVD (with boogy-woogie piano over the top.) The answers begin to dribble in.

5. Please Never Bring A Child Into The World (0:26:30)

Ricky comes up with his own Rockbuster - a Spanish archer, Elbow. Karls message to a soon to be born baby 'i wouldn't rush out.. it's not good out here.' Karl's theory about old people being like babys has been vindicated, as an elderly man has been refused service in an off-license as he didn't look old enough. Ricky wants to run XFM for a week, and see if they can sort it out. Conversation descends into Ricky repeatedly saying 'Karl,' it's driving Steve mad now.

Songs Of Phrase

'No More Cheeky Freak Of The Week'

Quotes

I bet Jesus Swore I hate him, I hate him i hate him