10 May 2003
10 May 2003 Ricky is incensed that the show failed to win any Sony awards and gives Karl money to perform degrading, homoerotic tasks.
(This show also features Steve and Ricky discussing the novelty pens with the woman whose clothes 'fall off' as the ink drains, and Steve remarks on how embarrassing it would be to be caught masturbating over it. They enacted this exact scenario in the second season of 'Extras' years later, with Steve's character Darren Lamb caught in his office with the pen.)
Track Listing
1. Disappointment
his show was deemed not worthy of anything. Not a look in. The panel looked at it and said 'No, definately not.' It didn't get a vote. That annoyed me on so many levels...
2. Indignation
I actually think it's a slap in the face. I want to know who the panel was, I don't know what Sony are thinking, just handing it out to the same old people - every clip they played was a funny phone call...
3. Bargaining
We had a meeting yesterday, we thought we'd better plan it a bit; we're gonna offer Karl money to do stuff. That's the quality of the ideas!
4. Capitulation
Why won't you do it? It's ridiculous; you won't have a shower, you won't take my shoes and socks off, you won't do anything! You won't give Dale Winton a rubdown, what will you do?!
5. Dejection
This is terrible. I mean, we didn't even say what the prizes were, we weren't gonna do this. The phone's going. Look at the phones; they're going mental.
6. Bizarre
You got tissue paper, ripped a bit off, made a little tie for me and put some in my ears.
7. Onanism
The only thing, I think, more embarrassing would be to be caught masturbating looking into a mirror.
8. Tedium
What've we done? We've done 'Take My Shoes Off For Money'. We've done that, we've done 'Ooh! Look At Those Funny Postcard Breasts!' and we've done 'We Didn't Win A Sony'. We've got nothing have we?
9. Flatulence
I was at me Mum and Dad's and Suzanne's sat on the floor in front of me, going 'Rub me neck, it's hurting'. And I hate doing that, it bores me. So I thought the only way to shift her is to let one go...
10. Monkey News
This monkey in the jungle - he's got a gig at a hairdresser's. Got himself a nice little job going at a hairdressers.
11. Retribution
I want the three people on the panel - we'll find them out - to say 'We didn't vote for you because it was shoddy, amateurish, annoying and there was too much swearing'
Quotes
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| Presenters | Ricky Gervais | Stephen Merchant | Karl Pilkington | |
| Others | Claire Sturgess | Ian Camfield | Simon Pegg | Nick Frost | |
| Features | Monkey News | Rockbusters | Song For The Ladies | Song For The Lovers Hip-Hop Hooray | Cheap as Chimps | White Van Karl | Songs of Phrase Cheeky Freak of the Week | Do We Need 'Em? | More... | |
