05 April 2003
5 April 2003 Ricky forces Karl to make several bizarre record-breaking attempts and becomes enraged by his consistent failure.
Track Listing
1. Punctuality
I'm just saying to you now - I turned up late, so I said 'Right, let's not argue. Let's do some stuff.' You weren't having any of it, I think at one point you were trying to be sick on my leg...
2. Exhibitionism
So he sat there, a 40 year old man, with his shirt off. Beautiful. I mean, I've seen most parts of your body now at one time or another...
3. Asphyxiation
Just keep your tongue at the back of your mouth and we'll stuff the hamburgers in. Oh come on! Do something! Steve will go and get the hamburgers! Come on! Do it! Phone in if you want Karl to eat burgers...
4. Interlude
There you go. That's the people from McDonalds wishing you good luck. I'll be back soon with the burgers...
5. Stuffing
I can't! I physically can't! Look... I'd have to be Jade Goody to get that in there!
6. Motivation
You've failed again, it's like your history O-level. Come on Karl! Do something for once! Succeed at something! Push it in! You've got nearly half a burger there!
7. Grapes
...and you've got to beat Matt Hand from the UK, who consumed a total of 133 grapes in three minutes on the 8th of November 2001...
8. Disappointment
I think those are bigger grapes than the ones I've seen before. They're quite big grapes... Look at his face!
9. Challenging
That's got nothing to do with this though, this is my gameshow here! Bob Holness didn't say 'Yeah Blockbusters is good but you never see him eating grapes.'
10. Betrayal
It's like I've saved a mouse from a cat's jaws and it turned around and bit me. Bubble! Bubble failed! Do you want to be like Bubble? Do you want to be like Bubble?!
11. Monkey News
It's not a story! It's about two chimps chatting, which doesn't happen! The zookeeper's going 'I wonder if they'll ever have kids?' and egging them on! That's the end of the story!
12. Ennui
They haven't got time to phone in now. Do you care? I don't care...
13. Blame
I actually felt that Ricky was out of order. He was discourteous, rude, aggressive, unpleasant - as one person e-mailed in; a dickhead. Someone else said you were fat and talentless.