18 January 2003
18 January 2003 Ricky investigates the effects of blunt objects on the skull, Stephen's feelings are hurt and Karl explores his sexuality.
Track Listing
1. Obnoxious
People always say to me, 'Oh, Ricky seems a bit obnoxious,' A guy on the tube did it, I swear to God. He said 'I was watching an interview with Ricky, he's not a nice piece of work!''
2. Head
All I know is that as I walked in the building - past the little kitchen area - you were hitting Karl on the head with a tin tray...
3. Monkey
You are just... You're talking such... God! I don't know if I can sit here and listen to this drivel!
This is the original telling of 'Ollie' the zoo chimp who tried to have it on with the zookeeper's wife at home. Finishing the day off with a little brandy, he becomes a bit of a charmer...
4. Professionalism
This is no longer an entertainment show! This is three people chatting to each other now and again! Sometimes we remember it's going out, sometimes we'll take a call for own amusement..
5. Sex
What would you do if you got loads of phone calls off women going 'Karl, whenever you're on the radio I have to do it. I just have to do it. Your voice just makes me'...
6. Doctor
This is why I never go to doctors, I don't like doctors 'cos this sort of stuff freaks me out. They can operate on your brain, they put you to sleep first, cut your brain case open and then wake you up and operate on you so you're sat there, with your brain open...
7. Death
My dad came in from work, my mum goes 'There's something wrong with Karl, I think it's serious. The doctor said he hadn't got long left'. My dad's like 'What?! He said that and then left!?'
8. Cockroach
I think we should get her on more often 'cos she sounds like she'll be a bit of an ally. She knew immediately that you were talking nonsense...
9. Error
It's better not to try, than try your hardest and be rubbish! We don't care, but you're not even reaching your own standards.'
Quotes
RG: he said "when I was in Scotland I just looked at how many macs there were and there were 42 pages of 'em" 4.45 KP: "I had a couple of free shortbreads" 5.20 SM: "What did you do with this information" - KP: "I 've stored it"
KP: "they cut your brain case open" 30.19
KP: "did I tell you the time that the doctors said I was gonna die" 34.05 KP: "it used to be chockka, once the school found out everyone used to go there and it'ld be like "have a cake" KP: "I must have had six or seven jam doughnuts, a few congress tarts" KP: "wont say his name but he said, "well, doesn't look like hes got long left"
KP: "it only turns out its a pork chop that she sat on about five years earlier and it had stuck to her buttock" - "i couldnt believe it"
KP: "the first thing I found out is that they've got 18 knees" KP: "why when it was invented has it got that facility" KP: "im sure if we were sat in a fridge we would be a bit quiet" KP: "mad world though innit"