07 June 2003

Xfm Series 2 August 2002 - August 2003 List of episodes

Episodes: 24 August 2002 (Transcript) 31 August 2002 (Transcript) 07 September 2002 (Transcript) 14 September 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of') 21 September 2002 (Transcript) 28 September 2002 (Transcript) 05 October 2002 (Transcript) 12 October 2002 (Transcript) 19 October 2002 (Transcript) 26 October 2002 (Transcript) 02 November 2002 (Transcript) 09 November 2002 (Transcript) 16 November 2002 (Transcript) 23 November 2002 (Transcript) 30 November 2002 (Transcript) 07 December 2002 (Transcript) 14 December 2002 (Transcript) 21 December 2002 (Transcript) 28 December 2002 (Transcript) ('Best of') 04 January 2003 (Transcript) 11 January 2003 (Transcript) 18 January 2003 (Transcript) 25 January 2003 (Transcript) 01 February 2003 (Transcript) 08 February 2003 (Transcript) 15 February 2003 (Transcript) 22 February 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of') 01 March 2003 (Transcript) ('Best of') 08 March 2003 (Transcript) 15 March 2003 (Transcript) 22 March 2003 (Transcript) 29 March 2003 (Transcript) 05 April 2003 (Transcript) 12 April 2003 (Transcript) 19 April 2003 (Transcript) 26 April 2003 (Transcript) 03 May 2003 (Transcript) 10 May 2003 (Transcript) 17 May 2003 (Transcript) 31 May 2003 (Transcript) 07 June 2003 (Transcript) 14 June 2003 (Transcript) 21 June 2003 (Transcript) 28 June 2003 05 July 2003 12 July 2003 19 July 2003 26 July 2003 02 August 2003 09 August 2003 16 August 2003

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Track Listing

Coming up, a link about describing your looks

I won't have a bad word said against the boss, says Steve, as they come out of the record "Thunder Road." Karl--"how would you describe yourself?" turns into karl having a go at Steve again. "Tall, big eyes." Link about gay handkerchiefs. Karl researched it.

Gay hankies

Only Bruce had a baseball cap in his back pocket, not a hanky. But karl talks about armpit fetishes (red hanky in RH pocket, so apparently Bruce is an armpit freak), blue and white one---sailors, etc. Every colored hanky represents something.

The Spanish Fireman and a State of Arousal

Karl then goes into a recount of a holiday long ago in Tenerife. He's gettin it on with Suzanne, the fireman comes around saying everyone has to vacate due to a fire, and karl wont go out, due to his 'state of arousal.' He wanted to make sure it was a proper fire before leaving the room--he'd rather burn than be embarrassed. Surely the Spanish Fireman kept him aroused yeah? Discussion of gay lifestyle..."they go out late don't they...we've covered that." --says karl. But--if Bruce Springsteen asked Karl for "a little cuddle" would he do it? Ricky talks about squeezing Karl's head. Has Karl got Monkey News and Rockbusters this week?

Sleight of hand linguistically

Discussion about dying...if you knew you were gonna die in your sleep but not the day, it wouldnt matter, wouldnt it? brilliant. I've lost you Karl haven't I? "I think you lost him on 'sleight of hand linguistically' " says Steve.

What Feels like Chamois Leather?

Karl's balls feel like wet chamois leather. not wet or shaved, just smooth. he doesn't like it. How would you want to die? "I want to die of old age in my mother's arms" said an 11-year old mate of Ricky's. So of course they took the piss out of him for that. Steve would re-enact Grand Theft Auto and run people over if he knew he was gonna die within 24 hrs. Ricky suggests Karl could watch the show 24.

Monkey Sanctuary - mini Monkey News

Karl then teases the holiday at the monkey sanctuary in Cornwall for holiday. Karl's dad used to nick shoes in Manchester, not just the goods out of the phone box in Wales.

Rockbusters

M---that fella likes sucking on Iron (Metallica) D---the jamaican fella spots a boat (DeBarge) E---do you want a game of tug of war...well it's up to you, you own it. (Europe)

Educating Ricky - Sort of =

Karl--"someone's made a chicken with teeth." WHY? "Don't know, cause they can." "they did the sheep the did the clonin' steve--"mouse with the ear on its back" Cloning discussion an' that. Ricky wonders how they could get Karl as a pundit on a panel on some TV program. Karl reading out of the same magazine which talked about hankies..."they can make your testicles bigger." Ricky calls them "manacas" ....did he mean to say "maraccas"? More testicle discussion. Ricky "Send this link to Doctor Fox, he'll love it"

Cheeky Freak of the Week

Going back to 1829 It's Siamese Twins again. They're gonna crop up a lot cause they've got double chance. HA! These are the first ones according to Karl. They go on tour around the US and Europe having a wash an' that. Tangent: Steve then talks about the little dividers on the conveyor belt at the supermarket, and impatient people behind them. And now, back to Chang and Ang, the original Siamese Twins, in the bath. Karl says that's about it. no more story.

Having at it all night

Having sex all night...short discussion. Siamese twin could take over for the knackered one yeah? then some songs, and now ...

Monkey News

Bits and pieces: The mammal with the eyes that point out furthest from their head, --one point six centemeters to be exact....Steve.-- sort of a goggle-eyed thing. Steve lets Karl just dig the hole deeper. Steve--"I'd be annoyed if the monkey's beat me." Karl--"how long is one point six?" Steve--"drop your trousers!"

Monkey news extra now

"Another monkey couple got married in Romania. had a good do, celebrated in the pub, went back to the cage that night." A whirlwind romance...she was in the tire, he saw it, he said i'll have a go at that. he was in the zoo knocking one off, she said, i'll do that for ya"

Then, the show recap. Ricky: "we avoided saying 'erection' for two hours!