28 June 2003
Track Listing
Bow and Arrow
Short Ricky birthday recap--Jane got him a "real bow and arrow." Karl got a real gun for a present as a kid "Just shootin' cans an' stuff." Ricky intros Karl to Ross Kemp at dinner in the week.
Arse Shaving
Jonathan Ross shaved his arse once, when he was bored in a hotel room. Karl again recaps finding 42 pages of "Macs" in the Edinburgh phone book. Karl could have gotten £1000 for letting his arse get shaven. Gotta make sure the testicles are out of the way, says Karl. Jonathan Ross also endorses "The Elephant Man" as one of the best films ever. The listeners save Monkey News with email petitions. Rockbusters on super thin ice again but not dead yet.
Advice on Breathing
Ricky and Steve hate all the excessive noise in Pubs. More mini-cab stories, including Steve repeating the time the fake cabbie didn't know the way to either Camden OR Swiss Cottage. Karl propositioned about Meditation and Evian--on meditation/breathing, "Well, I'm 30, I've done all right" on Evian--"have you ever tried this? It's WATER!" Karl does Rockbusters. Zoo talk...pity the animals no one goes to see. Ricky would love an owl on his desk.
Maggie the pet
Karl talks again about his magpie 'Maggie.' Steve calls Ricky's squeezing of karl's head a "sexual peccadillo." Treating the homeless--Karl treats with a diet coke. Karl slags off Bob Geldoff & foreign aid and doesnt even realize it. Chat about charity, cancer, being homeless. Steve intros the show, "I survived a 200-pound tumor." They can't believe a tumor could be that big. 200 pound TUNA Ricky says. Karl cannot bear to go the Doctor and disrobe, and he doesn't like the feel of his balls.
Cheeky freak of the week
Steve does the jingle with Ricky; The cheaky freak is a girl with 4 eyes, 2 noses, 2 mouths..."mad, innit." "Can she talk with her mouth full?" A bonus CFOTW--smallest man. In a picture next to a fruit bowl. Rockbusters answers coming up.
Rockbusters
TB-Tony Bennett (Toe-Knee Bin-It) (Ricky--that's a yellow card); TD-The Dark-Ness (Ricky--goal, goal); FNM-Faith No More (Ricky--no! doesn't count! ...Ok... I'll give it to him...there's no Jamaican fellas seeing Icebergs...). Dave Suckling takes the prize there.
Monkey News
...And Ricky has the little bongos that Karl gave him for his jingle. brilliant....how to hand down a Monkey Spa to the kids, which are not blood relatives of the fella monkey, who's gettin on in years. And the fella monkey's name is on the business. RICKY--"please check the facts otherwise you could ...look like ...a twat ...spouting shit... on the radio!" Ricky--"You're educationally subnormal"
External Links
| Series 0 | Series 1 | Series 2 | Series 3 | Series 4 | ||
| Presenters | Ricky Gervais | Stephen Merchant | Karl Pilkington | |
| Others | Claire Sturgess | Ian Camfield | Simon Pegg | Nick Frost | |
| Features | Monkey News | Rockbusters | Song For The Ladies | Song For The Lovers Hip-Hop Hooray | Cheap as Chimps | White Van Karl | Songs of Phrase Cheeky Freak of the Week | Do We Need 'Em? | More... | |
